BE PREPARED TO HANDLE THE SNAKES .... and that is what's happening at the gym. There are multiple pronged approaches to fight the oppression of the 'suits' and we won't stop until the unjust policy of spin sign ups 20 minutes before class is repealed. After hearing my credentials - I was a Marshall at a Grateful Dead Concert at Harpur College - (who knows what university this is part of?) and I did participate in numerous anti-war demonstrations back in the late 60's/70's, mostly to get out of school and try to meet caring, sensitive like minded 'hippie girls' in Tye died tee shirts ..... and yes I'm not proud of this behavior but at least I'm not claiming to be a Vietnam veteran, as an elected official in a neighboring state - 5 points for naming the state, 10 points for giving his name, and 25 points if you know the branch of the military he did serve along with the correct answers to the other two questions.
We started an e-mail campaign -and to the manager's credit - she responds to each e-mail with the same 'corporate speak' claiming this is a pilot project. Concurrently, an attorney crafted a proposal - in typical legalese, taking 6 paragraphs instead of three sentences to get our point across. There is rumblings of the need for civil disobedience - everything from sit ins to putting gum in the gears of the spin bike. I'm going to do my best to keep things peaceful, but with tempers flaring, anything is possible. If we don't take a stand now - who knows what the next step the corporation will take .... pay toilets, which is nothing more than a tax on a G-d given right. Stay tuned ... showdown is June 7th. The gym staff - trainers, front desk, management are stockpiling weapons and the early morning spinners are learning the words to We Shall Overcome. It's going to get allot uglier.
For those readers who complained that there wasn't enough golf in last week's blog, my apologies. I'm trying to shorten the blogs in preparation for starting to tweet. We faced a predicament this week since Barry, Richie and I were involved in a charity race, one which we wished never had to happen. We did find an alternative time to play on Saturday at 2 PM , without affecting anyone's personal preference to attend services, so please don't send the Shabbot police to close down the blog. We played at Sprain, which is a bit like playing in the wild kingdom. There are geese and baby geese (geeselings?) all over. Just as the title of this blog indicates - don't shake the bushes or else ...... don't hit a golf ball into a family of geese, unless you want to anger a mom/dad goose who will flap his wings and start hissing at you. There were also birds, muskrats, squirrels, chipmunks all mocking us as we traipse after this little white ball.
We all showed continued improvement on the course. Lost our fourth (Joe) after 9 and Barry after 12. Captain Rich navigated the course expertly (not unlike Sully) and had us play holes 7, 8, and 9 rather than 16, 17, and 18, given the slow moving foursome in front of us. (For us to complain about another group playing too slow is quite unusual.) Dan - if you are surreptitiously, (good SAT word), reading this blog to see if you are mentioned, I want you to know the Captain is using a weighted glove to help his swing. He'd be happy to share the dvd and instruction book with you. We figure you could buy the glove, use it this season and then return it for a full refund. (See reference to previous year's blog - passover table and chairs.)
Speaking of which - do you know this is my third year of blogging - close to 75 entries and I still DON'T HAVE A TV SITCOM. Can you believe some nothing tweets about the grousing of an old man is being turned into a show .... and this material that rivals anything that you've seen on Mash, Seinfeld, The Office, or Channel 5 news .... Well I can't and I'm not going to take it anymore. Be advised - unless I get feedback that leads to greater interest on the part of advertisers and then my own show, then I can't guarantee that you'll have this blogger around to kick too much longer. (another political reference - tell us whom this is referring to.)
Since my drives are now consistently longer than my putts, my next task is to stop killing so many worms with shots from the fairway. (Honest injun - that's probably not PC is it? - I had a worm on my ball that I was putting last week - and was not allowed to remove it without taking a stroke.
Savor this blog - it may be the last.
Max OUT.
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4 comments:
Actually, you marhsalled a Beach Boys concert at Harpur, but we get the point!!
what is this tweeting that you talk about (please dont go to the darkside...) also i think that baby geese are goslings, but i might have made that up :D
I can't offer you a sit-com but I think your trials and tribulations would make for a great read. If not a book consider submitting it to the Sunday NY Times complaint column.
And thank goodness Barry clarified your marshall background - I didn't see you keeping order at a Grateful Dead concert.
Josh is right about the baby geese - and corrected you before I had the chance to! Actually, I saw it before, but was letting you slide - never again!
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